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Warrior Dash Was First Hurdle In Personal Obstacle Course

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Good afternoon on this August Tuesday everyone.  The Warrior Dash was this last weekend and it was a fun race.  The race was the only thing fun about the day.  It rained the entire morning and really made the course extra muddy.  It was hard to run in areas that made sense to run in.  Did you understand that?  In other words, the expected dry areas to run on were now just sloppy and dangerous.  Many people were sliding and slowing down.  Some were complaining about how their time would be affected.  Others did not care.

Import 2My heat began at 1 PM.  My wife and I were thankful were had donated to St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital and have access to the VIP tent to stay out of the rain.  That was a highlight.  Able to wait it out the rain and remain dry majority of the time.  Also a few private port-a-potty‘s.  Even though I was prepared, I was still emptying my bladder every 15 minutes.  Nerves will never go away.  The same thing would happen in wrestling before going through the curtain.  Go to the bathroom a few times and then it was showtime.

There was even a wait to get on a few obstacles.  One obstacle in particular where one had to crawl under barbed wire had a good 5-7 minute wait just to start it.  Thankfully the rain stopped right before the start of my heat.  Even with that blessing from above the course was treacherous at points.  I may not be the best conditioned athlete, but certain points I know I could have been running at if it was not so muddy.  When I start a physical activity, I like to finish as hard as I start the event.  The mud detracted from that as caution and safety took over.

I think I was the only one to finish the race with no mud on their chest, head, and face.  I wear contact lenses for a race like this.  I also wear swimming goggles to protect my eyes in a race like this.  I received compliments on my use of swimming goggles.  Some wore tutu’s, other team’s matching shirts, and others barely anything at all, I wore swimming goggles.  If I could have any of these courses mud free, I would.  There are many like myself who would love a course with nothing but obstacles & less distance running, without having to join the military.

The distance running in majority of these mud runs is a necessary evil.  At least cut back on the mud.  There is no need for it to be waist deep.  I would love to see more challenging obstacles in the typical Warrior Dash without having to sign up for an Iron Warrior Dash or Urban Warrior Dash.  Some of these groups offer more than one kind of run.  The Spartan Race and Tough Mudder do the same as well.  There is even a kids Spartan Race.  I think that is a great event for kids.  I plan on tackling the courses for the Spartan Race and Rugged Maniac in the future.  I know I will need to work on my stamina and do the necessary cardio.

Import 1One of the best personal reasons for me to do this race is to complete a personal challenge.  I have run this race two years in a row with no teammates and I savor the sense of self accomplishment in finishing a race of this kind.  Where teammates are helping each other on each obstacle, I tackle them alone.  The feeling of no limitations on my personal self increases the light on the person I have kept down for years.

Myself.

I have always played it careful when it has come to letting my true self shine.  Years of bullying bullied suppressed the person I know I can be.  Fearful of others opinions without even considering my own.  Not putting me before the comments that were being made of me.  I am not just talking about physical bullying, but verbal as well.  There were some girls in middle & high school that would also be verbal bully’s.  Verbal bullying went on for me well into college.  I can remember working at a company in college where my peers would make me feel small from it.

There are times certain incidents will pop into my head.  I never let them take control of me or my confidence these days.  I use it to be more determined to succeed.  Another step in that direction is to go all out, not caring about what anyone thinks.  As Nike says, to just do it.  I keep preaching about leaving that proverbial comfort zone.  It is time for me to take my own advice and be comfortable in my own skin.  To be the opinionated, sarcastic, wise ass that everyone knows me to be.  Not in a bad way though.  It is just my personality and who I am.

Camera Roll-250In the movie Tombstone, Val Kilmer is Doc Holiday and Kurt Russell is Wyatt Earp.  Doc Holiday passes a comment regarding Wyatt Earp’s wife.  Wyatt Earp chuckles while his brother Morgan, played by Bill Paxton, took offense to the comment.  Wyatt tells Morgan that Doc meant no harm by the comment, that it is just his style and he doesn’t mean anything.  The same goes for me.  I never mean any harm from the comments or jokes I may pass, it is just my nature and who I am.  I only poke fun at the people I like.  I never mean any disrespect.  My sarcastic, wise ass humor has always worked with my quick wit and intelligence.  It is just who I am.

I have been standing alongside the highway of life, holding my thumb out, hoping to hitch a ride with someone instead of taking the chance to drive that road myself.  It is about time I did.  I have had control of the wheel many times.  I just never mapped out my own course.  I seemed to rely on others for that.  No more.  Time to put myself out there and not worry about failing or criticism.  I have learned from other failures in life, why should it stop me now?  Everyone needs to experience the failure as much as success.  If you never learn from your failures or mistakes, then you will be doomed to repeat them.  I have had my fair share of mistakes and failures, believe me.

On my YouTube channel I will be starting a weekly video blog.  I may decide to post more than weekly if the desire and enough topics come up that warrant it.  I have a strange feeling it will on occasion.  Many issues about current events, the New York Jets, my past, my future, other projects, random opinions, being bullied, and plenty of other topics that require more commas.  Sometimes writing is not enough as certain emotions and body language make video a better form of self expression.

I do not want to ramble on, cramming topics that have no relation to each other into one post.  Your mind would be over the place more than a Jack Russell Terrier.  Which means I will have to come back more often to update everyone.  Sounds good here.  I enjoy saying what everyone else thinks.  Making statements and passing comments that make others gasp, but know those comments are true.  If you are not a fan of that, sarcasm, and comments that “straddle the line”, then you may want to read another blog.  If you are one who enjoys that kind of wit and banter, then I encourage you to keep coming back to enjoy yourself while having a few laughs.

Time to get some other items done.  Will be moving in a few weeks so time is spent packing and tossing out items that have been sitting in closets for over 10 years.  Many bags of clothes and other items have already been donated to Goodwill.  Still a ton more to go through.  I will have my first vlog up next week.  It will be raw with no graphics or effects, but no sense in waiting considering I have waited long enough.  See you all soon, on here and on YouTube.

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Remembering My Father On The Day Of His Passing

Today nine years ago I lost my father.  I think about him everyday.  But today I think about him most, obviously.  The times he took me to my wrestling tournaments, going to New York Jets games, visiting Belmar, helping him with his doctors, and so much more.  I figured I would do my first video blog and talk about it.  I can get more out verbalizing than I can writing sometimes.

Obviously, I did not talk about everything.  I did not want to put a script together just to talk about my dad.  There are some posts on here where I talk about him.  For now, I will let everyone listen to me from here rather than reading anything more.

Clear Thoughts & Random S**t!

I always come on here and talk about the New York Jets.  Either about the documentary, the team, the organization or to even post other articles from various sources.  I feel that no one is really caring about what is going on to sports fans in this country.  Seems many are aware and do not care.  Do not care that they and their families can not afford to attend sporting events on the professional/major league level.  A lot of people I interview say one thing and try to be the proud fan and not go with what the team/organization wants.  Next I see them with their tail between their legs, head down, and caving in to what the team wants.  So people know they are sheep are will always go with the herd, even if the herd turn out to be lemmings.  It is hard to find those who stick to their beliefs and do not cave in to peer pressure.   I have more respect for those who stick to their guns than those who feel they have to be a part of the majority and feel that is the way to be accepted. Those who have the disposable income will argue this.  Just because one can afford certain luxuries does not make you a better fan than someone else.  Takes a bigger person to be humble than egotistical.

OK,  I had to get that off my chest.  Not aiming it at anyone specific.  Just feel there are so many football fans out there willing to go quietly into the night.  We all have a voice in this country and we all deserve to use it.  I do not care if no one reads this I just feel the need to get certain things off my chest.  I do not get hundreds or visitors here, not even an average of 10 people a day come here.  I do not care.  Eventually, when you make enough noise someone will hear you.  I can scream and make noise until the day I die.  I hold back a lot and do not let my true opinions be heard.  I just felt the need to be 100%  open on so many things.  A lot may come out rambled but hey, this is my blog and I will do it however I feel like it.  So used to holding back and not speaking my mind.  Following rules and doing what it takes to make other happy.  I have not been doing what it takes to keep myself happy.  I have so much pent up inside the Incredible Hulk is about to come out, without the devastating destruction of course.  Just want my mind and soul to be free of a lot of opinions and thoughts. So here goes..

I liked doing the insurance thing.  Felt good to help people.  I did not like being one who relied on commission for my income, was not me.  I need that steady income ocming in from a base salary or even a contract job.  At least you have something in writing or a guaranteed check coming in.  I worked with people who did certain things just to make that commission though.  Some did underhanded things because they knew the size of the commission they would get.  Some did not even have the proper licensing to give the advice they were giving.  At the company I worked for, they prayed on the weak minded and ill informed about their portfolios just to sell them certain products.  If I saw a person was in good shape or could not afford something, I would not sell them something.  I would not sell to someone just for that commission.  Some did just to make that commission, even if it was not good for the client.  Sometimes it felt I was one of the only people with a conscious in that place. Some did everything they wanted to do just to get ahead.

I was in some trouble in the late 90’s, nothing major.  I needed an attorney.  There were a few others with me at the time who knew first hand what happened.  I covered for one of them and changed my story with my attorney to protect one who I thought was my friend.  When I asked them to talk to my attorney to give their story to help me, they wouldn’t.  They gave me excuse after excuse.  One said he could not even get to a phone to talk to my attorney.  hiding down the shore during a project claiming there was no phone to get to.  I told very few others about what happened and those not involved offered to help.  They offered to help pay my attorney fees but I said I would take care of it.  Others even wanted to go after those who were involved and didn’t help me when needed.  I told them I appreciated it and I knew if they went after them, they would not be walking.  If this same incident had happened to someone else close to the ones who did not help me, both of them would have helped.  To me, the guys who were with me that night were cowards and not my true friends.  They hid and did not want to be involved.   If they considered me a friend, they would have helped me out.  Instead, they let me to rot and could not even help me in a time of need.  Even when both came out form under their rock, neither offed any assitance.  I know if it happened to other mutual friends, they would have been there for them.  No matter what excuses they gave me, I will never believe them in my life and they will always be liars and pussies in my book.  Karma is a major bitch and as Roddy Piper said in They Live, he is back in heat.  I am sure she had multiple orgasms over this.

First time I got that out to someone other than my wife.  My hands even shook a bit as I typed it.  Guess I kept that down in me long enough it just felt good to let it out. I really do not know why I felt nervous.  Not like I am going to screw over a friendship.  Maybe nervous because for the first time I am actually writing from the gut.  Getting out true emotion I kept down and never got off my chest.     I knew the aforementioned guys form professional wrestling.  I was back stabbed and screwed over so many times when I was involved in professional wrestling.  I was naive and gullible, some took advantage of that early on.  plus I was not the most mature person.  Only later I would smarten up and be mature.  Took too long to get there.  The only true friends I have from wrestling I can count on one hand and I knew MANY.  The only way to really survive is if you have TRUE talent or willing to back stab your way to the top.  Nice guys like me never see the finish line.  Too much drama in wrestling too and I am talking about behind the curtain.

I always push off writing.  I look at my laptop and tell myself later.  Well, later is here.  I know I need to write more often and keeping myself to a structure is not working for me.  I guess from now on, anything goes.  Whatever I feel like writing about I will.  If I manage to anger someone or piss someone off, then I guess someone is actually paying attention to what I write.  At this point in my life, I do not care who I piss off anymore. No more holding back.  Some truths or opinions need to be told.  At this point, any attention is good attention.  Might have to add to this later.   Reminds me of what the Joker (Jack Nicholson) said in Batman, “it feels very liberating”.